The Pressure Never Ends


In Economics we were taught that human wants are insatiable. Well, I say human beings are insatiable, period. I say this because with every stage of your life they seem to expect more from you. When you graduate from Secondary school you'd have people asking if you've gained admission yet. Then you're in the University and they're like, "Scarlet you've not graduated?". Do you even know when I got in school? I want to ask. When you do graduate they go "You've not still gone for NYSC?"

Why so curious ehn? Why do we feel the need to know? Why can't you wait till the person volunteers the information? Or wait till you stumble on it? It doesn't end with NYSC o. That's even when it really starts. You'll hear, "Na husband remain o", "na to start work now o". As though they kept a job for you somewhere. Almost everyone starts asking when you're getting married, who's the lucky guy, bla bla bla. Someone even asked me "when is the wedding?", like she knew about an engagement I was not aware of. God help you if you're in your mid to late twenties or even older. You might just have to get ear plugs.

When God does it for you and you get married, you'd think they'd just let you enjoy your marriage and relax. Mba o. That's when you'll hear, "the thing don enter?", "any bun in the oven"? To be honest, I've been guilty of this. But I've learnt to keep my curiosity to myself, especially in matters like this. You just never know how the person would take it. People are different and some more sensitive than others. While I do not have any problems with a CLOSE friend asking if I'm pregnant yet, depending on how long I've been married and maybe trying to get pregnant, I may not want to hear it. I remember having a neighbor say to me after I got married, "Iyawo give us baby o". Like seriously, give us baby? Us who? Did they want my baby for than I did?

Then you get pregnant and are barely showing before you start hearing, "you never born?" Hian! You have your baby. Praise God. World people still won't let you rest. You just got back from the hospital and someone is asking. "Hope it was not CS o?" "Hope no tear?" "Did they cut you?". Is it your business? Does it matter? Like, why so curious? As your baby gets older you'd still hear things like, "is she sitting yet?" "Has she started walking?". Of course she has.  Since the average child starts walking at 8 months!

While you're still trying to juggle motherhood with being a wife and a career person. And still dealing with the midnight nursing, diaper changes and forever changed body, someone thinks it's okay to ask why you're not yet pregnant for the second baby.  If they knew what I went through during and after pregnancy,  they'd ask me to take a 5-year break.

You see, human beings are insatiable. You can't live your life taking what people say seriously. Try not to take things to heart. Be sensitive to the feelings of others. Do not be overly curious. They did say "curiosity killed the cat that got the canary". Hehehe, I couldn't resist.

Till next time guys. 

My Very First Perm Rods Set

Hey guys, how you doing? I finally got round to doing my first perm rods set. I stumbled on some cold wave rods sometime ago. Finally! After months, abi years of searching for them here in Akure. I got a pack of twelve for 150 naira. I know right! I was not expecting it to be so cheap.

I unravelled the rods the next day and got this.

 I got a bit of tangling though while trying to unravel. Some strands of hair got ripped off and remained on the rods. That's when I noticed the rods have some raised points on them. They dont have a smooth surface. I'd have to be more careful the next time I use them, so I don't lose hair.

                                           By the next day, see what was left of the curls.

I decided to put my hair in a quick protective style after the hair started to shrink and poof.

That's it guys. Till next time.

DIY - Crochet Bob Braids

Hey guys, if you read my Naomi boom post you'd remember I said this post was coming. So I pre-twisted some hair using Brazilian wool earlier and I've been keeping it for when I'd need it. Well, the need arose when I took out the Naomi boom because it was too bulky for me.

I used 3 packs of the wool and I got about 80 braids in all. My corn rows were 10 or 9 and a half, because I joined two to form my part on the side. After attaching all 80 braids, I realised it was not enough. What I did was to use my leftover expression hair to make about 8 more braids. I was now able to cover up places I thought needed covering. The next time I'm doing medium sized, I'll make the corn rows smaller.

I crocheted the braids using a Bobby pin. It took me a while to figure out how to face the braids to make it bob in the way that I wanted. Note that to achieve the bob look, you have to braid tight.

I rocked the style for about three weeks and it still looked good when i took it out

. So, that's it guys. Will you be trying out this DIY? I'd also like to know what you think of the style. Let me know in the comment box :-).

When You're in Rome

I currently live in the west after having lived in the South for most of my life. The cultures and traditions of both areas are almost as different as night and day. Even though as a child I lived in Lagos for about 5 years, it did not prepare me for life in Akure. And y'all know Lagos is everybody's land.

Throw back pic to when my service year(2012). My first time in Akure. 

All my life before coming here, I did not have to kneel or genuflect to greet anybody. Here however,  it's a different thing. Every time I do it I feel awkward and ask myself if it is really necessary. I'm sure I look awkward too. Will they really think I do not respect them if I do not do it? Sometimes I'd only remember to genuflect after greeting. When this happens I pray I'm the only person who noticed. I wonder how awkward they must find me.

Then you have people who are your in your Aunt's age range adding "ma" to every sentence they say to you. I'm like, for real!? Because of these ones you too now want to add "ma" to everything you say. So they won't go and say this Omo Ibo is rude o. Really though, is it necessary? Whatever happened to just greeting "good morning"? Or simply answering "yes or no"?
Then the Aunty calling. It does not matter if your the person is younger than you. You call them Aunty. And if the person is your in-law....ha, you better call that Aunty with respect. Even if they're your baby sister's age.

Also, did you know that it's expected  of you to speak for your baby who can't speak yet? For example, if someone sees you with your baby and decides to have a conversation with her,  you have answer for the baby. And I'm thinking, why talk to a baby who you know cannot speak yet and expect their mom to answer? Even on the phone? How about you just say whatever you want to say to me? It really took me while to understand that they actually expect me to reply when they tell my baby good morning. That's after we've exchanged our own good mornings o. Haha! One person was even offended and told me when they greet my baby I'm supposed to answer. Hian! How am I supposed to know? We don't do that where I come from na.

Let me end my rant with this story. Someone told me how she went to the market and stopped at a stall. When she asked how much the goods cost, the seller told her she would not sell to her. Why? She did not greet her. Really? Are you not in the market to sell? Which is more important? Selling your goods or receiving greeting?

They say when you're in Rome you should act like a Roman abi? I will...but I'm a bad actor so no one should expect perfect delivery.

Relaxer Update

So, in my last post I told you guys about my hair challenges and the temptation to relax my hair. Well, I went relaxer shopping and I relaxed my hair... NOT.

Haha, I really did go relaxer shopping but right there in the midst of it, I changed my mind. I couldn't bring myself to buy it. Nope. This was after doing some serious research on texlaxing. My mind was pretty much made up. I was going to texlax my hair. I was really excited about the coming change. Went to the market and I just couldn't bring myself to go through with it. Guess I wasn't ready for the change after all.

I then decided to do what I should have done in the first place ; put my hair away. I got two packs of Naomi boom, amongst other things from the market with which I made crochet braids.

I did about ten corn rows to the back. I joined two in front to make a side part. Sorry, I couldn't take a clear picture of the corn rows. I crocheted the twists using a big bobby pin. It wasn't so easy to pull the twisted hair through the corn rows. They were really big. Or maybe it was because I used a bobby pin. For the life of me I can't figure out how to use a crochet pin. I did get one but had to return it for something else when I couldn't use it. I'll have to give it another try.

Anyways,  when the hair was finished, I did not like it :-(. It was too bulky for my liking. I couldn't sleep comfortably with it. Plus my cornrows were too tight. I only had the hair for a couple of days and I took it out, made the cornrows less tight and crocheted on my pre-braided  hair (details in another post).

That's it for now guys. See you some other time. Enjoy the pictures. Hopefully network or whatever will let me post them :-).

PS : Network only let me post that one picture :-(.

My Miracle Baby (Part 2)

About month after I had a chemical pregnancy  I started to have the same symptoms I had before. Symptoms I was now sure were signs of pregnancy. I started having them before I even missed my period. I kept it to myself for a few days then I told my husband who thought we should wait till I missed my period before doing a test. I  agreed even though I knew that period was not coming.

Mhenn, I could barely wait. A day after the period was supposed to show from my calculations, off to the hospital we went. This was actually because I was now feeling some kind of pain in my belly. I did not want what happened the first time to happen again so I thought it was better to go to the hospital in case there was something not right and could be helped by doctors.

They ran some tests after I told the doctor how I was feeling. They also did a scan. When the other results came in, my husband and I were called into the doctor's office. And, I got the the greatest news I'd heard that year was followed by the worst news. I was pregnant but the pregnancy wants to drop, in the doctor's words. Hian! Doctor said he was placing me on injections twice a week for twelve weeks, starting that day.

I asked the doctor why the baby "wanted" to drop and he said something about my hormones reducing because of my age. In his words, "when a woman approaches a certain age, some hormones start to reduce". That didn't quite sit well with me because I was not even 30 yet. Two, hormones reducing bawo? My mom had kids in her late thirties with no issues. Plus, my menstrual cycle was regular and all. Okay,  maybe I know nothing about these things but for whatever reason I did not believe this doctor's report.

I sha went to start the injections cos in my mind I was like, "shebi na just injections ......" I had to get it first at the hospital pharmacy. The lady we met there told us the injections cost Three thousand naira, each. Hian!  Only injection? All I needed was to do a quick maths for my brain to reset. And I thought, "why do we want to spend money that we do not have so much of to "preserve" a baby that God has already put there?". I just laughed and told my husband, "let's go".

We left but not before sowing a seed of faith into the lives of a newborn set of twins that had just been discharged from the hospital. On our way home we decided to branch by the church and see our resident pastor. We saw him, told him what the doctor had said and he anointed and prayed for me. He then advised us to go to a government-owned hospital for another scan. We followed his advice and the next day we were off to the state-owned hospital.
To be continued.

Blow Drying and Straightening Attempt

For the first time since I've been natural I attempted to straighten my hair. I washed and deep conditioned and then got to the task. I blow dried first using a blow dryer with comb attachment. I did this in sections and made a loose twist of each section as I went. Then I straightened each of those sections when I was done with the blow drying. It took quite sometime. Especially as the power holders took and brought back power in between:-) .

I almost gave up but I trudged on. I Bantu knotted each section after straightening. Only for me to finish and my hair was already reverting. All my labour.... Just poof! My hair merely looked blow dried, not straightened. Sigh. I had to bun it when what I really wanted was to flaunt it and show off my length. The struggle!

Guys, it's getting more difficult to take care of my hair. I don't know how much of this I can take before I backslide o. Right now, it's really tempting to get a tub of relaxer. I'm just tired. I'm not feeling my hair. It's not doing so well. Still shedding. My ends look terrible. Edges scanty. Overall appearance to me is unhealthy. And I don't have time. Did I mention how many breaks I had to take to attend to a fussy baby? I'm seriously losing it with this hair. Oh well, enough of my ranting. Just don't be surprised if in the next post I tell you I've relaxed my hair. This may very well be the last picture of my natural hair you'll be seeing.

Alright. See you all later :-).

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